Do you find yourself struggling to get a grasp on life?
Dealing with chaotic days that leave you drained and anxious?
Do you see people with beautiful, successful lives and wonder why yours is not as abundant?
This is my story, you can skip to the bulleted list below if you would like, but it always helps to see that you are not alone in your struggles.
I was the textbook definition of a ‘hot mess’ in college. I once had a friend tell me I was the most unorganized person they had ever met.
A planner/schedule? Never heard of her.
I was partying too much, working a crappy job, and focused on whatever my friends were doing. Although I studied, got good grades, and worked out- I knew that something was missing. This left me in a state of constant anxiety, and I often went into depressions that were just all around shitty.
Change was something I desired, but I was lost on how to execute this. I would read self help books, apply what I learned to my life, and see a difference every time. Then, I would settle right back to my old ways; never arriving to anything on time, staying up too late, and drinking too much.
It wasn’t until I graduated that I realized I was not living up to my full potential. I kept meeting 30 year olds who were still living in apartments, binge drinking/doing drugs, and barely scraping by. The universe was literally giving me a reflection of the energy I was putting out.
Terrified of what I would become if I stayed on this path, I left my life behind and moved home with my parents to save money, and focus on pursuing my passions. As a woman who values independence over everything, this was a hard pill to swallow. I left my friends, my nice apartment, and my old identity behind. I packed up my belongings, dog and cat, and flew across the country.
Immediately, I dove into every self improvement book I could find. This time I promised myself I would stick with it. I stopped drinking almost completely. It was lonely AF.
Then, I started working on my business project. A long-time dream I had no idea how to execute until I just went for it. I went down a life changing rabbit hole of books, courses, and a lot of stress. This all happened over the course of several months, so yes, change is possible in any time frame.
Getting your shit together will hurt. Change is painful and scary and makes your stomach tie itself in knots. If you are reading this, and resonating with it at all, I have a news flash for you. Who you are right now is not capable of achieving your dream life unless you are willing to CHANGE your everyday habits.
It’s time to get very real with your current identity, all the good and the bad. And then decide what kind of person you want to be. What life will you have? How will you go about your day, what will you eat, etc. All of my guides include a workshop (yes, with homework, it’s important) that dives deep into this, but I will share the basic tips here.
Here is how to start getting your shit together:
1. Stop with the bad habits. All of them.
You might think its fine to binge watch Netflix all day because you worked so hard yesterday. Or that since you are tired, leaving the dishes piled in the sink this one time won’t hurt.
Wrong.
This theory is called the compound effect. It can be seen in the stock market, in nature, and in our lives. Every small thing you do during your day, wether it is a positive or negative on your life, will eventually become your reality.
If you want to truly reach your potential and get off of the hamster wheel of chaos, you must decide that you are simply not that person. You aren’t the person who binge drinks, or binge watches TV, or eats junk food. You don’t skip your workouts when you are tired, or neglect your emotions or loved ones.
Do you think the person who wakes up every morning and works out at 6 am says; ‘wow this is so easy, I love this.” NO. She pushed herself out of her comfort zone. She told herself she was that kind of woman, and made it her reality. And no matter how painful it was, she stuck to it.
2. Get organized, and express gratitude every day- and I mean everyday, no excuses.
Before you go to bed, write a list of what you will do the next day. Then, get very serious about your intentions with this. And no, putting down ‘go to work’ does not count. What time will you wake up? When will you workout? What kinds of food will you eat? What will you do at work? If you have pets, when will you make time for them? If you are in a relationship, set a timer to call or text your partner, plan to leave them a love note. Your day needs to have a purpose, and you need to stick to it. Our brain loves it when we break things down into small pieces, and lay out a framework.
Gratitude will change your life. I started doing this as a freshman in college. Every day I write down three things I am grateful for and truly feel that sense of gratitude in my body. It can be as simple as this; I am grateful for the sunshine today, for getting a good workout in, and for my dog for all the joy he brings to my life.
3. Figure out what you are passionate about.
If you haven’t already, write a list of all the things you love and why. Pay attention to what you can speak easily about, and what makes you excited and driven.
For example; my passions are health/fitness, motivating others, mental health, animals, and nature.
Once you get clear about these, find one that can make you an income. Having a passion project will ignite a fire in you that will make you wonder how you ever existed prior to this. I understand that most people already have a 9-5 or are working for someone else. That is ok. I am too! This is my passion project. My clients, blog and social media platform have given me so much happiness, and one day I hope to make this my full-time career.
4. Keep a planner, and a white board calendar.
Being organized will make an immense difference in your life. I highly recommend investing in both of these and actually using them.
5. Keep a clean home.
This one should not be neglected. What comes to mind when you think of a house with clutter everywhere, dirty dishes, dirty floors, and un-matching decor? You probably assume that person does not have their life together. That is low vibrational shit. We don’t put that into the universe. Even if you have the crappiest apartment, you can invest in organizational bins/totes, hang some art from Home Goods, and vacuum your floor. Clutter is a huge motivation killer, especially in the bedroom or office.
6. Stop blaming others for your failures.
Everyone has a story, some worse than others, but you can’t let this stand in the way of your success. You must realize that you are both the problem, and the solution- therefor its up to you to take action.
There is a professional who can help you overcome just about any trauma, and getting help is nothing to be ashamed of. You should be proud of yourself, actually. No one is too ‘cool’ for therapy. Just go.
(Side note: a trauma can be something as simple as your parents yelling at you a lot as a child, or being bullied in middle school. These things stick with us in our subconscious mind, whether we know it or not. We gotta remove them somehow.)
I hope this helps. The truth isn’t always comforting, but I hope that if you read this, you choose to make today the day. The day you change your life, and stick with it.
I LOVE hearing your success stories, and answering any questions you may have. My DM’s and emails are always open.
If you want to dive deeper into this with me, fill out my consultation form and lets chat! I will never send you off with a program without helping you train your mind first. That is the hardest, and most beneficial part!
Good luck and thanks for reading!